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I detest life-insurance agents: they always argue that I shall some day die, which is not so.
Insurance Agents
Stephen B. Leacock

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Egotism is the anesthetic that dulls the pain of stupidity.
Egotism
Frank Leahy

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If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.
Dogs
Fran Lebowitz

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When you jump for joy, beware that no one moves the ground from beneath your feet.
Celebration
Stanislaw J. Lec

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The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.
Conscience
Harper Lee

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I like whiskey. I always did, and that is why I never drink it.
Alcohol and Alcoholism
Robert E. Lee

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The trouble with Ian is that he gets off with women because he can't get on with them.
Seduction
Rosamond Lehmann

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I feel that if a person has problems communicating the very least he can do is to shut up.
Communication
Tom Lehrer

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I wish people that have trouble communicating would just shut up!
Communication
Tom Lehrer

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It is a sobering thought, that when Mozart was my age he had been dead for two years.
Age and Aging
Tom Lehrer

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There are few things that you can't do as long as you are willing to apply yourself.
Work, Hard
Greg LeMond

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If I don't practice the way I should, then I won't play the way that I know I can.
Practice
Ivan Lendl

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It is true that liberty is precious. So precious that it must be rationed.
Freedom
Vladimir Ilyich Lenin

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There's nothing you can know that isn't known.
Truth
John Lennon

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I try to leave out the parts that people skip.
Strategies
Elmore Leonard

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The real sadness of fifty is not that you change so much but that you change so little.
Age and Aging
Max Lerner

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When you choose the lesser of two evils, always remember that it is still an evil.
Evil
Max Lerner

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You know that when I hate you, it is because I love you to a point of passion that unhinges my soul.
Hatred
Julie De Lespinasse

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In university they don't tell you that the greater part of the law is learning to tolerate fools.
Colleges and Universities
Doris Lessing

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Love one another and you will be happy. It's as simple and as difficult as that.
Love
Michael Leunig

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An epigram is only a wisecrack that's played at Carnegie Hall.
Aphorisms and Epigrams
Oscar Levant

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I once said cynically of a politician, Hell double-cross that bridge when he comes to it.
Uncategorised
Oscar Levant

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It's not what your are, it's what you don't become that hurts.
Regret
Oscar Levant

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Sings. Hope in every sphere of life is a privilege that attaches to action. No action, no hope.
Action
Peter Levi

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All that is not eternal is eternally out of date.
Eternity
C. S. Lewis

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Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.
[ Research ] Wernher Von Braun