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374 quotes

I've been drunk for about a week now, and I thought it might sober me up to sit in a library.
Libraries
Source Unknown

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If God thought about you as much as you think about Him, where would you be?
Opinions
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Inflation is when sitting on your nest egg doesn't give you anything to crow about.
Inflation
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Nothing can be said about our politics that has not already been said about hemorrhoids.
Politicians and Politics
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One should be more concerned about what his conscience whispers than about what other people shout.
Conscience
Source Unknown

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The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does.
Retirement
Source Unknown

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The broad general rule is that a man is about as big as the things that make him angry.
Anger
Source Unknown

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The difference between an itch and an allergy is about one hundred bucks.
Doctors
Source Unknown

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The less you know about a subject, the longer it takes you to explain it.
Explanations
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The one who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely the one who dropped it
Circumstance
Source Unknown

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There is no point in arguing about matters of taste.
Argument
Source Unknown

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Those who complain about the way the ball bounces are often the ones who dropped it.
Complaints and Complaining
Source Unknown

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Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
Present
Source Unknown

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We are the people our parents warned us about.
People
Source Unknown

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Wealth is what gives you the right to preach about the virtues of poverty.
Wealth
Source Unknown

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What you THINK about reveals what you ARE. Sometimes we need to do a check-up from the neck-up.
Mind
Source Unknown

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There is something about a bureaucrat that does not like a poem.
Bureaucracy
Gore Vidal

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We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.
Appearance
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

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I have learned not to worry about love; but to honor its coming with all my heart.
Love
Alice Walker

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Three keys to more abundant living: caring about others, daring for others, sharing with others.
Life and Living
William A. Ward

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THINK. Think about your appearance, associations, actions, ambitions, accomplishment.
Thoughts and Thinking
Thomas J. Watson

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All this fuss about sleeping together. For physical pleasure I'd sooner go to my dentist any day.
Sex
Evelyn Waugh

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One cannot imagine St. Francis of Assisi talking about rights.
Right and Rightness
Simone Weil

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Every actor in his heart believes everything bad that's printed about him.
Acting and Actors
Orson Welles

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You can say what you like about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins.
Dress
Mae West

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Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.
[ Research ] Wernher Von Braun